Ski Bum Advice: Why I’m Looking Forward to Ski Season

I should probably preface with the that fact that I love summer and fall and a part of me is sad that it will be many months until I see either again. On the other hand, I did manage to add another pair of boards to the quiver in the off-season, and I just can’t wait to give them a go this year. I swear sometimes I feel like a little kid the day before Christmas, only my Santa brings bags of powder and a snow groomer. Anyway, as we patiently await the return of winter, here are a few reasons why I am looking forward to the upcoming ski season.

Photo of cross country skiers from behind.
Photo courtesy of Big White Ski Resort

1. Getting into Shape

If the ski season were to start this next weekend, I’m pretty sure I would need oxygen just to get my gear up to the lodge. I wish some of the resorts had ski porters or something like that for folks like me. I would gladly pay the fee, plus a tip. The sad thing is it wasn’t like this just a few years ago. I went from running half marathons to crawling halfway up a flight of stairs in the span of a year. Seriously, if you hooked me up to one of those gizmos that makes you run with a mask on to measure your VO2, the results would probably say “Please Unplug Me.” Someone once said that this is how things go in your late 40s, and I scoffed at such a notion. Regardless, I refuse to roll into the season in woeful physical condition and rely on the old method of “skiing myself into shape,” as that method no longer works. I know because I have tried. Several times. Nope, you will find my plump posterior on the treadmill until the mountain opens.

If the ski season were to start this next weekend, I’m pretty sure I would need oxygen just to get my gear up to the lodge. I wish some of the resorts had ski porters or something like that for folks like me. I would gladly pay the fee, plus a tip. The sad thing is it wasn’t like this just a few years ago. I went from running half marathons to crawling halfway up a flight of stairs in the span of a year. Seriously, if you hooked me up to one of those gizmos that makes you run with a mask on to measure your VO2, the results would probably say “Please Unplug Me.” Someone once said that this is how things go in your late 40s, and I scoffed at such a notion. Regardless, I refuse to roll into the season in woeful physical condition and rely on the old method of “skiing myself into shape,” as that method no longer works. I know because I have tried. Several times. Nope, you will find my plump posterior on the treadmill until the mountain opens.

2. Dog Poop

I occasionally enjoy doing yardwork, and I believe I have previously mentioned that I take some pride in my lawn. However, I absolutely despise picking up dog do-do. I have teenagers in my house, and I bet you’d be shocked to hear that they don’t like picking it up any more than I do. So outsourcing the stinky task to my underlings is out. To make matters worse, we have been taking care of a snow white Bichon Frise for a family member over the past few months. Who would have thought such a small, cute dog could crap that much? Had I known, I would have negotiated better. Oh well, once the freeze is on and the ground is blanketed with white magic, the duty to deal with the dookie will be mercifully over. 

A skier on Lookout Pass during opening weekend, November 24, 2018.


3. Smiling at Winter Haters

Not everyone likes winter. I get it. But if you don’t like winter, why in the heck would you live here? Don’t get me wrong—I have nothing against folks that move to our area from places that don’t have snow, because without you, our region loses some flavor. Hopefully someone gave you the heads-up that it can get a little sporty when December arrives. No, I am wagging my finger at those of you who are from here and still complain about the colder months. As someone who lives in the sticks, I will concede that I grow weary of having to drive slower when the roads get slick. It’s bad enough that I have to dodge deer, turkeys, and the occasional turtle on my daily commute, but having to drive 10-15 miles per hour slower just grinds on me. Full disclosure: I actually said I was getting tired of winter late last February after plowing my driveway for the fourth time in a week. I later regretted saying it. As a side note, it continued to snow for another two weeks. You’re welcome. 

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